One Thing Mentally Strong Women Do Every Day

One Thing Mentally Strong Women Do Every Day

Mentally strong women know that things go wrong every day. But there is one thing that distinguishes them from those who haven’t joined “the tribe” yet. Mentally strong women have mastered the skill of staying calm. They know how to be the rock in a wild ocean.  

Would you like to be one of those women? No obstacle can stop you. Yes, things go wrong every day. But you know how to fix them. So let’s take a look at how to join the tribe.

What is Does it Mean to Be Mentally Strong?

To be part of the tribe every one needs to develop and cultivate her own strength. So take a quick look at what mental toughness means.

Toughness is defined as the ability to handle difficult situations. The adjective mental describes anything having to do with the mind. So mental toughness means that we use our intellectual abilities to control our emotions and reactions to what happens around us

Yes, correct! We can control our thoughts. We are the boss of our minds.

Mentally strong women are able to not let the circumstances around them affect their actions. Similar to a millionaire’s mindset they have an extraordinarily strong mindset.  Besides, they have a very positive attitude. This means that they have a special way of interpreting  what happens to them.

How do mentally tough women see the world?

  1. They  don’t feel sorry for themselves. They never see themselves as victims. Or say life is not fair.
  1. Mentally strong women understand that challenges – no matter if we face them daily or consistently – are a natural part of life. 
  1. They try to handle challenges by looking into the science behind it and focus on facts.
  1. Though Females accept their emotional pain and give it a healthy amount of attention but don’t let emotions run their life. They don’t suppress it. Instead mentally strong women accept the pain and learn from it.
  1. Mentally strong women never stop believing in themselves – no matter what happens around them. They know they can find an answer to move forward.

Seeing ourselves as a victim is usually a result of our emotional pain: A pain that we seem to be unable to control and that overwhelms us. The trick is to understand that the only way to control our pain is to change our attitude towards what we haven identified as the cause for our pain. 

Let’s look at an example. 

How mental strength can help to mend a broken heart

Let’s assume we are in a relationship and our partner decides to end it. This incident causes heart break. We might feel like being left behind, worthless and/or rejected. Here are three things we can do.

First of all, by suffering we allow the action of the other person to have a very negative impact on our life. Does anyone have the right to cause us that much pain? 

Secondly, who decides at which point in life  this incident is positive or negative? Let`s realize that this is only a matter of perspective. 

Thirdly, the fact that the other person decided to end the relationship for whatever reason should let you ask yourself shouldn’t we be with someone else who appreciates and loves us for who we are? 

How Mentally Strong Women Increase Their Mental Toughness 

Four easy steps to increase mental toughness.

  1. Take charge of how we react to outside circumstances (like described above)
  2. Accept that we cannot change the circumstances around us like weather or people
  3. Learn to trust yourself
  4. Find role models whose behavior we can copy and we can learn of

Learn to trust yourself 

Strong women know that they make good decisions for themselves. Thus, we have to learn to get in touch with ourselves. We have to reconnect to our gut feeling. When making a decision simply start asking your gut feeling: is this decision right for me? 

Find strong role models

Our brain loves to learn from role models. The reason is that our mirror neurons will copy emotions and actions of people who surround us or we study. So how does that help us to improve our mental strength? Our brain needs positive influence. That is why nothing is as powerful as a tribe of like minded people.

Not all of us are lucky to have mentally strong people around us. An alternative way is to study people by watching or reading about them. Here are some examples of people who have a certain mental toughness.

Viktor Frankl 

Austrian neurologist, Psychiatrist, Holocaust Survivor

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”  

This is one of my top five mental strength quotes. It impressed me deeply. It might  appear a little abstract at first sight. But to me this sentence was the gateway to maximizing my mental strength. I started studying Viktor Frankl’s book:  “Yes to life – In spite of everything.” It is about his experiences in German concentration camps.

Firstly, it helped me to put my own challenges in perspective. Mine were nothing compared to what Frankl had to endure. 

Secondly, I was impressed about how much strength humans can have. Developing mental strength under such dramatic inhuman conditions made me realize that we can all do that – no matter what our circumstances might look like.

Oprah Winfrey

Philanthropist, Humanitarian, Businesswoman, Actress

Oprah was born as a total extrovert to a single teenage mother in rural Mississippi.  No one could have imagined  that Oprah would become one of the most influential women in the world.

By 19 Oprah was already the co-anchor for the local evening news. She had the courage to address topics that were still taboos in the 20th century. As the show hostess, she popularized and revolutionized the tabloid talk show. . Today, she  one of the most influential and powerful women, 

What can we learn from her that helps us build mental toughness? It is the power that comes from the fact that a single voice can have such a positive influence in the world. It is the courage she had to address taboos that shows us that we might have a message to tell as well. A topic that might seem small to us but might have the potential to have a very positive impact to many others.

Mental Toughness Under Special Circumstances

There are some challenges in life that are truly special. An example are battles – on court and off court for example. On the courts it’s about honor and money. Off court it can mean life or death. Do we need to train for special moments that scare or seem to threaten us?

Yes, we do! Like professional groups  we can practice stressful situations ahead of time.  This will help us to build a certain amount of natural resilience.

How Mentally Strong Women Build Natural Resilience

Would you like to know what you need to practice? Imagine the situation as well as possible and try to pay attention to your negative emotions first.

Take the top three emotions. Ask yourself why you feel scared for example. Then, try to find something you could do to solve that fear in that situation. Afterwards, come back in the present and see what you can proactively do, to make sure you will be prepared in case you really get in this situation. A very common fear is that your relationship ends. What will you need to get over that? Try to name three things, like: friends, family, financial independence,  Make sure you either have those things already and maintain them or start building them

This will lead to more inner peace and make you stronger. 

Let’s look at more situations where you need to stay calm and see how mental strength could help. The most important step is to prepare yourself ahead of time as mental strength is nothing else than training. 

Mentally strong women are made, not born.

How mentally strong women stay calm during an interview

Prepare yourself in three steps:

  1. What is your goal?
  2. Why is this the right job for you?
  3. What are your biggest fears during the interview? Focus on the realistic ones and try to prepare yourself

Be aware that if you prepare yourself as best as you can, you know that you don’t have anything to regret in case it is not meant to be. 

How to stay calm during a mri (Magnetic resonance imaging)

You should call the clinic in advance and share your fears. They are professional and many people have the same challenge. Also ask yourself if your fears are realistic. With some music, closing eyes and focusing on breathing  time passes more quickly. Practice the situation at home. Visualize breathing deeply and relax your muscles. Also when your mind races, focus on something positive and pleasurable. 

How to mentally strong women stay calm with newborn

There is only one secret. Make sure you have a surrounding where you only have to focus on yourself and the baby. The rest needs to be taken care of by someone else for about three months. If your surroundings don’t allow that, get help as soon as possible. Call a helpline, a social worker or a clinic. Have the courage to get support. The first weeks are practically impossible to plan.

How to stay calm when baby is crying

Babies always cry. That’s normal. It is also a way to get attention.  

 Be aware, crying babies are hard on every one. If you have weak nerves, there are three things you should plan ahead of time:

  1. Write a diary in which moments the baby cries. Try to identify patterns like time of the day, what kind of food the baby or mother (in case of breast feeding) had. Was there a stressful event like noise before that the baby might react to?
  2. Ask yourself what stresses you most in the situation. That helps you to get calmer and organize help
  3. Have an emergency plan: if the baby doesn`t stop and you are at risk losing nerves. Who can help? A parent, a neighbor? A nurse or clinic?

How to stay calm with newborn

There is only one secret. Make sure you have a surrounding where you only have to focus on yourself and the baby. The rest needs to be taken care of by someone else for about three months. If your surroundings don’t allow that, get help as soon as possible. Call a helpline, a social worker or a clinic. Have the courage to get support. The first weeks are practically impossible to plan.

How to stay calm during an examination or test

Prepare yourself ahead of time. I used to be one of the people who were scared to death of failure. Thus I had to prepare myself weeks ahead of the test. Study hard and make sure you did everything you could. If you fail, try to get insights on what went wrong. Be brave and learn from your mistakes.  Before the test, breathe deeply and slowly. 

How mentally strong women stay calm when angry

For a long time that was my biggest challenge in life. My anger drove me crazy and made me feel very guilty. I simply didn’t know how I could get so upset. Let me share the following proven secrets with you.

  • Get out of the situation immediately. Lock yourself in the bathroom if necessary to understand why you are angry: what was triggered inside you that made you angry?
  • Check if someone crossed a boundary. If yes, stop them!!! Tell them that you have boundaries and they need to respect and accept them.
  • Check if the people who “caused” your anger are good for you. Have the courage to accept that not every person is good or right for us.
  • Remember: some people try to provoke you on purpose. They enjoy seeing you upset. Don`t give others the power to make you angry.

How to calm down anxiety

Most of the time fear has a reason. This emotion signals us to be aware of danger. So please ask yourself: is this alarm right or just a false alarm? Try to breathe deeply and be aware of your surroundings? Is this a bad situation where you should remove yourself from? Often the fear isn’t even ours. If you are around someone who is scared all the time, the probability that you will feel what they feel is very high. Distinguish their fear from yours. Have the courage to manage fears proactively and ask yourself: what would make me feel better right now? Most likely it is removing yourself from a situation, person or place that simply isn’t right for you. This is the same for most people, so please don’t feel guilty. 

How to stay calm under pressure

This is a very challenging one. Because pressure is something very positive for some of us and the opposite for others. There are those people who cannot be productive under pressure at all. They need to make sure this gets reduced to a minimum by planning and talking to people who might cause it. Otherwise it might lead to depression or other diseases. Try to remove yourself from the situation as much as possible. 

How to stay calm at work

If you constantly feel challenged to stay calm at work, you probably have too much stress at work. Be honest to yourself: is this the right job, surroundings, or co-workers for you? What about noise? Noise is also a huge source of stress and could be managed by using ear plugs, different office hours or moving in the building. It is very important to identify the source of stress and ask for help if necessary. Constant stress reduces your productivity, will lead to burnout and you having to leave your job.

How to stay calm during a presentation?

Presentations are a constant office activity. How should we manage it to perform our best?

  • Practice at home in front of the mirror
  • Drink plenty of water to insure your body and brain are working well.
  • Make sure the presentation  makes you feel well prepared. Otherwise keep on working til it does.
  • Check the purpose of the presentation and expectations.
  • Don’t try to be perfect. People like it when others are human. Be prepared that something might go wrong and be ready to laugh about the situation. Nothing is as healing as laughter.

Be Savvy, Be Smart – Trust SimpleSavvySmart

No matter if you are an office worker, a soldier, a teacher, a stay at home mother, a leader or just someone that has decided to become mentally strong.

Start today and take control of your thoughts. Your thoughts can control your emotions.  Don’t react to what happens around you!

Become a mentally strong woman – You`ll love what you can be! 

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